She (the friend) was still married when her AP dumped her. Her DH found out she had the affair and divorced her because of it. |
It’s like any other feeling and it’s better to acknowledge it and move on, rather than suppressing or dwelling on it. I have no interest in any type of fling or relationship, but I still notice men who attractive, funny, charismatic, weird, talented, athletic; whatever it is that catches my attention. I meet a lot of new people via kids activities, work, hobbies, some of them know me as a parent, others don’t. Either way it doesn’t matter because I am never going to act on it. Crushing on celebrities doesn’t do it for me, they are too far removed. I think for you this crush is just a new limmerance because you had turned off those feelings. It’s totally fine to feel what you are feeling but you need to acknowledge that it is fleeting and fickle and not real at all. Just sexual attraction and nothing deeper or of any real or meaningful importance at all. |
Having an affair was excellent, absolutely worth it. I would not take it back.
And btw, I got caught cheating. Still would not take it back. |
Physical or emotional |
Both |
Did not get caught and did not regret it one bit. Still happily married and enjoying retirement! |
I had an affair and it was fun and I don’t regret it. Don’t get caught and know it always ends so just have fun. |
Agree. Crushes fun. All normal and good. Channel it into better sex with your spouse. |
You gotta know your spouse. Sounds like you have a great one, I can’t imagine most spouses would take this well. |
What happened to the guy your friend cheated with? What would you call him? |
I had a sudden crush on my then-new next door neighbor. He was funny, easy to talk to and just so handsome. I’d get all flustered when I’d see him, so tried to avoid any situation where it was just the two of us without our spouses and/or DC around.
Feelings faded suddenly when DH mentioned how much this neighbor reminded him of my own brother. Sounds creepy, but DH wasn’t wrong - neighbor’s mannerisms and personal style were indeed very similar to my quirky but cute younger brother. Then, I was horrified with myself but at least I could reframe how I see my neighbor-almost as my brother: no more crush. That realization eliminated any awkwardness in talking with him. Anyway, his family got transferred and moved. |
Character flaw? |
22207? |
Yes, I definitely do! I have always had a very active imagination and have many fantasies that I entertain and enjoy.
Imagination and fantasy are a really important part of my healthy sex life |
Yuck |