Do you think the nicest people are usually more attractive?

[Anonymous]

My friend has the sweetest girls. They are so nice and kind. The girls are also adorable. It got me thinking would I notice the girls were so kind and nice if they were not also beautiful. I wonder if they are treated better since they are pretty.

The most catty and petty women I have encountered are usually not the most attractive. I wonder if they are this way because they were not treated well and feel jealous.

Are better looking people just better well liked?

[Anonymous]

Of course they are.

[Anonymous]

No. I’m really ugly but super kind, funny and helpful. Nobody notices.

[Anonymous]

What do you mean by “attractive”? Genetically lucky or groomed?

The most catty and petty women I have encountered are usually well groomed, feminine, but genetically average/ugly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What do you mean by “attractive”? Genetically lucky or groomed?

The most catty and petty women I have encountered are usually well groomed, feminine, but genetically average/ugly.

These girls are children and genetically lucky.

I do agree that the most gossipy and petty women are average/below average naturally but very well groomed. Same goes for the very judgy women. They are often not very attractive but well groomed and may think they are attractive?

[Anonymous]

The mean girl is also usually not the prettiest.

[Anonymous]

Definitely not. Lots of physically attractive people are completely and totally evil.

Hence the old saying “Pretty is as Pretty does.” (Meaning, it’s not enough to be pretty, you have to act nicely too.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Definitely not. Lots of physically attractive people are completely and totally evil.

Hence the old saying “Pretty is as Pretty does.” (Meaning, it’s not enough to be pretty, you have to act nicely too.)

I didn’t necessarily mean prettier people are nicer. I was wondering if the nicest people are usually attractive since they are likely treated better than unattractive people.

[Anonymous]

Hmm, no. It's more complicated than that.

For reasons I don't entirely understand, sometimes people who are treated well become kind and treat others well, and sometimes they come to believe they are better than other people (and thus treat others as less than). It's a mystery to me which happens but it's very seen both outcomes, including with people who were particularly attractive as children.

Also, some people who are treated poorly as children become jerks as adults (see, e.g. Donald J. Trump and his sons). But some people who are treated poorly as children become incredibly thoughtful, kind adults who work hard to never do to others what they experienced. Why? Again, I don't know. I just know I've seen both.

And to complicate things further, not all attractive kids are treated well (they may be treated poorly because they are attractive, actually-- adults can get jealous of children), and not all unattractive kids are treated poorly (there are genuinely great people out there who will be kind even to the homeliest child, maybe even extra kind to them, knowing much of the world will be harsh).

So, no, I don't think the nicest people are usually attractive. I think people are a complex sum of their experiences and genetics and there are many factors that go into how someone treats others.

[Anonymous]

I’ve met many men who were extremely nice, but,

- that part of their personality was a major turn-off.

[Anonymous]

No, I know many very nice people who are physically unattractive.

[Anonymous]

Not at all. I think attractive people are less likely to be nice and more likely to be snobby.

[Anonymous]

You know, it's easy to think that being attractive might give someone an edge in how they're treated, but kindness isn't something that's just skin-deep. Sure, people might notice someone's looks first, but it's how they act and treat others that really matters. As for cattiness and pettiness, that can come from all sorts of places, not just how someone looks. Being treated well and feeling good about yourself can definitely impact how you treat others, but it's not the whole picture. At the end of the day, being genuinely nice goes a lot further than just having good looks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve met many men who were extremely nice, but,

- that part of their personality was a major turn-off.

You might want to look into that. Sounds like you like trouble

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The mean girl is also usually not the prettiest.

+1

The mean girl usually believes they are the prettiest. The tend to harvest "cheerleaders" to keep around them during life, so they tend to think that they are prettier, smarter, etc. than they are. In other words, delusional. They tend to target nicer, more pleasant people (who have seen more adversity in their life). The "cheerleaders" tend to not be as loyal as the mean girl thinks